Life is a mirror. People reflect back what we believe about ourselves. That’s a tough message. Test it out yourself. Ask, “How many times have I been critical of myself or someone else today?” Be honest. Even if you thought it. Do you notice that in others too?
People proudly say they are their own worst critic; like it’s some medal worthy accomplishment. These same people also complain that they get overlooked, treated badly, taken for granted or not valued.
Here’s the rub, when we are harsh with ourselves, other people follow our lead. If we’d like people to view and treat us better, we must show them how. Self-care and self-compassion are essential. How we view and respond to ourselves impacts how we interact with others, professionally and personally.
It starts with our thoughts. We have a complicated relationship with our “thinking” self. The mind is constantly chattering. When we pause to notice, we can find ourselves in hostile territory.
Wouldn’t it be nice if we included appreciation in that internal chatter for what we are doing well, instead of only harsh critique? Balanced perspective is good for our outlook. What if we tried to make friends with our thoughts throughout the day? What impact could that possibly have on our interactions?
Today’s GYGO* Tip
Prepare to engage your thoughts with consideration. Appreciate what you have done well. Don’t worry, your well-practiced fault-finding feedback loop will speak up so you don’t get a “big head”. (It’s been the center of your attention for years). What could happen if you appreciate yourself? Do you want a more balanced experience? Make friends with your mind.
- Schedule time daily to practice. You deserve at least 5 minutes a day.
- Write down 2 or 3 things that you are doing well.
- Appreciate yourself. Take a moment or two to feel gratitude for what you ARE doing.
Stay with this for 30 days. Even if you miss one or two, keep going. Start where you are. One day at a time. You just might feel more resilient and creative. It’s possible the people around you may follow your lead.